it's summer, i'm supposed to be happy.
i'm supposed to be okay.
i'm supposed to be stable.
i'm supposed to be living.

but suddenly i'm not.


i am scared.
i am stressed out of my fucking mind.
i am depressed.
i am frustrated.
i am confused.
i am lost.
i am broken.
i am overwhelmed.

and all i want to do is sleep for fucking eternity.
i don't deserve this right now.

and i haven't had a fucking panic attack in over a fucking year.

i hate this so much.
and all i want to do is sleep and scream and fucking do something to get
rid of the monsters boiling inside my chest.
but i can't because i don't have any fucking vice.
and i hate just sitting her waiting for the feeling to subside.