i feel like i need to properly introduce myself or something. anyways...
i'm kendahl. i'm seventeen and reckless. my mind is a giant abyss, full of mysterious corners i am exploring every day. music and art mean more to me than anything, i can't even fully express how those two components almost make me up entirely and without their existence i would be nothing. in fact, music affects me more than it should. i am dreamer. a fighter. a lover. i care too much about things beyond my control. i'm strong minded. i have a huge heart and i always forgive people, even if they've damaged me a whole lot. i fail at holding grudges // staying mad at someone for a long period of time. i used to have really severe depression and self-injure and was fucked up for a good majority of my life, i'm happy // proud to say i have fought my demons and i've climbed out of the darkness. i've been successfully 8 months clean. i love traveling and the 3 places that have had a major impact on me are india, kenya and paris. i love getting drunk. tequila is my favourite. i don't mind getting rowdy every now in then, especially with my good friends or really anyone. i really like meeting new people. i love fashion and consider it an art and a way of self-expression. people think i may have a hard exterior but trust me, i don't judge anyone because i know for a fact EVERYONE has a story whether we care to admit it or not. To Write Love On Her Arms has been a massive influence in my life and i have supported them since almost the beginning, that's 3 and a half years now. Jamie Tworkowski is the one person who I want to meet in the entire world and if i ever do get the chance to do so, i can die happy. His words have saved me on numerous occasions and i thank him for that in every way. i have minor OCD but only when it comes to my nails (they always have to be painted) and i don't like it when my food touches one another when arranged on a plate. i lovelovelovelove concerts, i cannot reiterate enough how much they mean to me. just the adrenaline that you feel and feed off from everyone, screaming your lungs out to all the lyrics, seeing your favourite band and moshing the fuck out. there is nothing more beautifully rebellious then letting your hair go and hardcore dancing. that point at a concert where you, the band/artist and everyone are all singing together in harmony is my favourite thing ever. just the feeling of being alive. i love dance parties. end of story. i am ridiculously obsessed with the Jonas Brothers and have no denial in telling everyone that I do. i listen to pretty much any type of music. i like to think i have easy ears. autumn is my favourite season. i like going to thrift stores, i love cheap shit. sometimes i can be timid if i feel intimidated. you'll know i'm thinking a lot if i'm being really quiet. i have random outbursts of laughter. i think i can sing well but i'm too embarrassed to sing in front of anyone except for my family. i've been a pescetarian for 2 years. aka pretty much vegetarian diet but still involving seafood. i have a knack for collecting large amounts of jewelery; everything from necklaces, bracelets, earrings to rings. i like big sweaters. i love cuddling and spooning. cliche. i know. photography is my medium of choice. i friggin love polaroids and wish film cameras weren't becoming outdated. i am obsessed with Parisian culture. i often feel like my life is a movie that just hasn't been actually documented yet. i do really weird things sometimes, like if my head is filled with chaos i'll go to the park and spend 3 hours there and just go on the swings and listen to Bon Iver or some cute, acoustic crap that sings about teenage angst. every day i get inspired. i like reading but i wish i could do it more. i love reading into people with fucked up lives, i don't know there is something so very intriguing about this world filled with broken people. sometimes i get motivated but its always so much easier said than done. all my friends are different from me, i love diversity. i cannot handle labels, and categories and shoving everything and everyone into specific boxes. i think too much. i think i'm pretty intuitive, its kind of scary. most days, i am in love with life. i think i have a quiet self-confidence. i have a hard time expressing what i think sometimes. i'm a night owl and have really awkward sleeping patterns. i sleep backwards on my bed. i just realized i have been doing this for the past 2 years. when i believe in something, i put all my passion into it and i feel like my soul is set on fire, i feel invincible. i love 3 am drunkenness and walking along the streets at night alone or with my besties. i think i have developed a smoking problem. i'm not proud of it but to be honest there is something very classy about it. you can blame Paris for that. british accents make me melt. i don't care i will always love boys in tight pants. seriously. i love people unconditionally even if we hardly talk or if they've ever hurt me. i am considered pretty "white washed" but take pride in my heritage. a lot of people think i either look philippino, cambodian, hawaiian or a halfer. i am chinese okay. sometimes i will just lie on my bedroom floor and listen to a song on repeat extremely loud for hours. i love sleeping but never get enough of it. my hair never goes the way i want it to. i only like cliches when i experience them for myself. tea > coffee any day. i could be bi if i wanted to but i like boys, i don't know i'm pretty whatever about my sexuality. on occasion i do drugs but that's only MDMA and salvia. and to be honest the hype about e is dumb and pretty decent. i like sex. there. but i'm done with one night stands. i have really fucking weird conversations in my head sometimes. i day dream way too much. i curse like a sailor. i love my family and friends and are the most amazing people in the entire planet. i love listening to people's stories. i have a shoe fetish. i collect old film cameras. i wish i lived in the 60's, 70's and 80's just too experience all the amazing revolutions that happened and woodstock and real good-old-fashioned rock n' roll. i think about all the international friends i've met and think about what exactly they're doing at this exact time and day. i do that with the bands i like too. i have a thing for guys with those side bangs, musical talent (especially guitar), artistic and read. i think i'm smart but i don't use it to my advantage. this isn't about dwellin in arrogance but a lot of people think i'm going to be "famous." i still don't understand what this means. my mum likes to think i have this "star quality" i think i semi-comprehend it but i feel vain if i kind of know its the truth. i don't make sense 90 % of the time. i can read people's energies. i love gingers. i am a closet star wars and star trek fanatic. i think its truly incredible the ridiculous amount of weird faces i am capable of making. i have 3 drunk faces. i don't like structure, but i think its necessary in certain situations. i am a walking contradiction. i love rooftops. and trees. and skylines. and birds. and rainbows. and ugly dolls. i like a lot of things. ignorance is the one thing i have absolutely no tolerance for. i like piercings and tattoos. oh and the hype about tattoos is really dumb too, it all depends on your pain tolerance, how big your tat is and where you get it. my favourite weather is when its sunny but its raining at the same time. i will always be jealous of all the girls bands sing about. i have strange habits; when i fancy someone i will listen to their favourite band because it makes me feel closer to them. i dwell frequently in infatuation and fantasy. honesty, community and love are essential. i like quiet mouths with loud souls. i am the epitome of an oxymoron.
i am too lazy to write more. this was a pointless entry. maybe i will add to it another day.
i'm kendahl. i'm seventeen and reckless. my mind is a giant abyss, full of mysterious corners i am exploring every day. music and art mean more to me than anything, i can't even fully express how those two components almost make me up entirely and without their existence i would be nothing. in fact, music affects me more than it should. i am dreamer. a fighter. a lover. i care too much about things beyond my control. i'm strong minded. i have a huge heart and i always forgive people, even if they've damaged me a whole lot. i fail at holding grudges // staying mad at someone for a long period of time. i used to have really severe depression and self-injure and was fucked up for a good majority of my life, i'm happy // proud to say i have fought my demons and i've climbed out of the darkness. i've been successfully 8 months clean. i love traveling and the 3 places that have had a major impact on me are india, kenya and paris. i love getting drunk. tequila is my favourite. i don't mind getting rowdy every now in then, especially with my good friends or really anyone. i really like meeting new people. i love fashion and consider it an art and a way of self-expression. people think i may have a hard exterior but trust me, i don't judge anyone because i know for a fact EVERYONE has a story whether we care to admit it or not. To Write Love On Her Arms has been a massive influence in my life and i have supported them since almost the beginning, that's 3 and a half years now. Jamie Tworkowski is the one person who I want to meet in the entire world and if i ever do get the chance to do so, i can die happy. His words have saved me on numerous occasions and i thank him for that in every way. i have minor OCD but only when it comes to my nails (they always have to be painted) and i don't like it when my food touches one another when arranged on a plate. i lovelovelovelove concerts, i cannot reiterate enough how much they mean to me. just the adrenaline that you feel and feed off from everyone, screaming your lungs out to all the lyrics, seeing your favourite band and moshing the fuck out. there is nothing more beautifully rebellious then letting your hair go and hardcore dancing. that point at a concert where you, the band/artist and everyone are all singing together in harmony is my favourite thing ever. just the feeling of being alive. i love dance parties. end of story. i am ridiculously obsessed with the Jonas Brothers and have no denial in telling everyone that I do. i listen to pretty much any type of music. i like to think i have easy ears. autumn is my favourite season. i like going to thrift stores, i love cheap shit. sometimes i can be timid if i feel intimidated. you'll know i'm thinking a lot if i'm being really quiet. i have random outbursts of laughter. i think i can sing well but i'm too embarrassed to sing in front of anyone except for my family. i've been a pescetarian for 2 years. aka pretty much vegetarian diet but still involving seafood. i have a knack for collecting large amounts of jewelery; everything from necklaces, bracelets, earrings to rings. i like big sweaters. i love cuddling and spooning. cliche. i know. photography is my medium of choice. i friggin love polaroids and wish film cameras weren't becoming outdated. i am obsessed with Parisian culture. i often feel like my life is a movie that just hasn't been actually documented yet. i do really weird things sometimes, like if my head is filled with chaos i'll go to the park and spend 3 hours there and just go on the swings and listen to Bon Iver or some cute, acoustic crap that sings about teenage angst. every day i get inspired. i like reading but i wish i could do it more. i love reading into people with fucked up lives, i don't know there is something so very intriguing about this world filled with broken people. sometimes i get motivated but its always so much easier said than done. all my friends are different from me, i love diversity. i cannot handle labels, and categories and shoving everything and everyone into specific boxes. i think too much. i think i'm pretty intuitive, its kind of scary. most days, i am in love with life. i think i have a quiet self-confidence. i have a hard time expressing what i think sometimes. i'm a night owl and have really awkward sleeping patterns. i sleep backwards on my bed. i just realized i have been doing this for the past 2 years. when i believe in something, i put all my passion into it and i feel like my soul is set on fire, i feel invincible. i love 3 am drunkenness and walking along the streets at night alone or with my besties. i think i have developed a smoking problem. i'm not proud of it but to be honest there is something very classy about it. you can blame Paris for that. british accents make me melt. i don't care i will always love boys in tight pants. seriously. i love people unconditionally even if we hardly talk or if they've ever hurt me. i am considered pretty "white washed" but take pride in my heritage. a lot of people think i either look philippino, cambodian, hawaiian or a halfer. i am chinese okay. sometimes i will just lie on my bedroom floor and listen to a song on repeat extremely loud for hours. i love sleeping but never get enough of it. my hair never goes the way i want it to. i only like cliches when i experience them for myself. tea > coffee any day. i could be bi if i wanted to but i like boys, i don't know i'm pretty whatever about my sexuality. on occasion i do drugs but that's only MDMA and salvia. and to be honest the hype about e is dumb and pretty decent. i like sex. there. but i'm done with one night stands. i have really fucking weird conversations in my head sometimes. i day dream way too much. i curse like a sailor. i love my family and friends and are the most amazing people in the entire planet. i love listening to people's stories. i have a shoe fetish. i collect old film cameras. i wish i lived in the 60's, 70's and 80's just too experience all the amazing revolutions that happened and woodstock and real good-old-fashioned rock n' roll. i think about all the international friends i've met and think about what exactly they're doing at this exact time and day. i do that with the bands i like too. i have a thing for guys with those side bangs, musical talent (especially guitar), artistic and read. i think i'm smart but i don't use it to my advantage. this isn't about dwellin in arrogance but a lot of people think i'm going to be "famous." i still don't understand what this means. my mum likes to think i have this "star quality" i think i semi-comprehend it but i feel vain if i kind of know its the truth. i don't make sense 90 % of the time. i can read people's energies. i love gingers. i am a closet star wars and star trek fanatic. i think its truly incredible the ridiculous amount of weird faces i am capable of making. i have 3 drunk faces. i don't like structure, but i think its necessary in certain situations. i am a walking contradiction. i love rooftops. and trees. and skylines. and birds. and rainbows. and ugly dolls. i like a lot of things. ignorance is the one thing i have absolutely no tolerance for. i like piercings and tattoos. oh and the hype about tattoos is really dumb too, it all depends on your pain tolerance, how big your tat is and where you get it. my favourite weather is when its sunny but its raining at the same time. i will always be jealous of all the girls bands sing about. i have strange habits; when i fancy someone i will listen to their favourite band because it makes me feel closer to them. i dwell frequently in infatuation and fantasy. honesty, community and love are essential. i like quiet mouths with loud souls. i am the epitome of an oxymoron.
i am too lazy to write more. this was a pointless entry. maybe i will add to it another day.
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